It Takes Being Away From Your Children...

Much like many, if not all parents out there, we crave/need/hope for some adult time with no kids present. It's very important to your relationship with each other as well as with your children. It takes having children to appreciate adulthood and it takes being away from your children to appreciate parenthood. My children are my rock. I have experienced deployments pre- and post-children. I had my friends before my children came along, but they were mostly single and considering that I was pregnant the first time, it was hard to fit into a college crowd going out drinking and dancing all the time. The next time, it was difficult because I had to care for a young child for the first time all by myself. On the other hand, I was never alone. It always made me feel better to hold my baby in my arms whenever I was missing my hubby and to look into her eyes and see the most precious gift that my husband had given me. Having children also made the time go by MUCH quicker. But then there are times that I cannot run away quick enough.

Unfortunately, for the most part, my hubby and I have had a hard time finding opportunities to go out alone whether it be just the two of us or with other couples or friends. We've always lived too far for any family members to babysit. In Hawaii, my close family lived on other islands and here in New England, the closest family member is 2 hours away. I have never used a babysitting service and we don't know too many teenagers in the area capable of babysitting. My daughter's school occasionally hosts parents night where they take your children for about 4 hours on a designated night, but that doesn't leave us a whole lot of time since we have to go searching for things to do and these nights are far and few between. So what are we to do?

I've considered joining Care.com where they do background checks and you can choose the credentials you would like your babysitter to have. Has anyone out there tried that site and found success? My only hesitation would be the cost and since my baby is still so young I am very hesitant on the people we leave him with. And if I were to hire a sitter, I don't really know where to start on what kinds of qualifications I should expect. I obviously don't want anyone too young to be handling my newborn. I also need someone who would actively "watch" my children - playing with them, keeping them comfortable, and following the routine I set out for them. I have trust/worry issues when it comes to my children. I'm sure most of you out there would recommend finding someone who is CPR certified for children and babies. And of course, I have to trust the person not to damage or steal anything in our home. Then there is the question of how much to pay the person. I assume the rate depends on the experience of the individual and may even vary from area to area. All of these questions have lead me to do some research. Feel free to give me your input as well.

Here is what I found.

According to Care.com, babysitters should be playful, active, responsible, trustworthy and have some experience. They should be fair in the rate they charge, patient, and authoritative. These were pretty obvious and I've already listed them above. But they also included a few things that I didn't think of right off the bat. Things like being flexible with schedules (in case we were to run longer than negotiated hours). This website also has a rate calculator! Now I have my answer for that going rate question. :)

After browsing around a little more, I realized that most credible websites had similar answers. And that as a mom, I pretty much knew all of this and needed some reassurance and to make sure I wasn't missing anything. :) Like I said, if you have anything to add, please do so. If you're like me and haven't really used babysitters before, I hope some of this helps you out too! Now go and set up a date with your partner! I've already got someone in mind that may fit all of these qualifications and a date idea in mind as well.